Over the six years I've been blogging I've experienced my fair share of spam. Most of which has had me laughing manically at it the appalling grammar and ludicrous scenarios. Personally, I can't imagine anything more boring than spending all day going around the web spamming people, even if it earns money. However, I can't deny that the spammers have given me some great entertainment. I've had more giggles reading their gibberish than I've had watching some BBC sitcoms.
I wrote about one spamming episode here which wanted me to send the spammer all my personal details.This had a certain irony to it as I don't even know all my personal details. In fact, every time I want buy something on the net I have to create a new password because I've forgotten what I used on the previous occasion.
Moreover, I am old and cynical enough not to believe I have won the pools or that I have deceased relative in Taiwan. Nor am I going to fall for someone telling me I am a brilliant writer and I have a wonderful website and that they (the spammer) are going to bookmark my site and come back repeatedly so I click onto their website which sells either Viagra or dodgy second hand cars or, if I subscribe to their website, will make me obscenely rich without the need to marry a ninety year old multi millionaire called Hu Chin Su who's made a fortunate in the soft porn and popcorn business.
By the way if your name's Hu Chin Su and you've made a fortune in popcorn please get in touch. (No need to mention the porn but I could turn a blind eye if necessary.)
So this morning I had another spam message which, just for a moment, I thought was actually someone with a sense of humour as they'd written "I have bookmarked this link as it is very educational, my kids will be following
this post too" on my blog post You are kidding me some women wear onesies? Then I realised it was a spammer as it had a link to another dodgy site - which is a pity as I always appreciate a sense of humour -sometimes even when it's not my own.
Oh well. To answer my question: Are spammers stupid?
Yes.
I am stupid?
Yes. Only I give a far better impression of not being stupid. Well most of the time anyway.
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I seriously thought spammers were people who were genuinely interested in the dross I wrote but when one started with "Which qualification should I take to be a mid-wife?" and finished with "Visit me at Midget skips!" I thought it was a bit odd! Yep...I'm stupid as I replied telling them I had no idea as I could barely look at a raw chicken without gagging!
ReplyDeletePS. I'd read your book...hell, I'd even pay for it! Thanks for cheering me up!!
Hello Mummyatthschoolgate!
ReplyDeleteI don't think you've been the only one to be confused by spammers, especially when you first start out blogging:) I would actually love to reply to spammers as there's nothing like the gibberish they write to inspire me to write my own gibberish! The only trouble is that I don't really want to encourage them back. Yesterday's spammer was a delight - he had a google+ profile with a very English name, looked like an American but his ISP was from Pakistan. It didn't take much to figure it out! Still, these little things sometimes lighten my day:))
Well I am delighted to hear you would buy my book and for cheering you up - and believe me you have cheered me up no end by writing that! In my dreams I imagine my novel becoming a best seller just so I can say to all those professionals who have maligned my sense of humour "Ha, you see people DO want be cheered up and have a laugh!"
It's a crazy and probably an unobtainable dream in a traditional publishing format, I know. But I'm not giving up just yet:)
Yes, spam can be very entertaining until you get so much of it that it forces you to cry uncle.
ReplyDeleteAt one point, I was getting so much spam that I was clearing out on the average, about 170 spam posts every two days from my spam folder.
I finally cried uncle when I got 65 spam hits in under one hour on a post that I had written that same day.
Within a week, I changed my commenting policy, and presto, no more spam.
Fortunately, I don't really get a lot of spam, G, as I've always had comment moderation on. It seemed like a good idea when I started out- to prevent anything untoward being published - but actually I've never had anything remotely offensive! Or maybe I'm just thick skinned:))
ReplyDeleteWow - 65 in one hour! That's got to be record!
I do not know if they're stupid, they're definitely take a lot of time to trash on other blogs.
ReplyDeleteSome of their comments also make me laugh.
Welcome Sandi:)
ReplyDeleteI clicked on your site as was delighted to see you were not selling Viagra!!!